Pandora, please stop trying to break up my marriage

Dear Pandora,

I find it a little disconcerting that you’re constantly trying to get me to see other people. Granted, your proposition is very compelling. After all, who could resist the super professionally designed ads that match.com is running on your website? “View Singles in Atlanta” – with the ability to select an age range – that’s great marketing right there!

Clearly you know I’m married because I’ve connected my Facebook account to your site. Clearly you’re pulling my age from my profile because you’re serving me up the age range of 30-39. So then you must have seen the recent pictures I’ve put on my wall, you know, the ones with my four kids and wife.  I know you see them, those adorable little kids that love having a dad.

Maybe its because I listen to Eminem or something? He does talk about the ladies with his sick rhymes, after all. But really, I’m good. Serve me up some of those awesome diet ads or something. But enough with the single ladies, please.

Sincerely,

Happily married dude

Pandora is trying to hook me up #dudeimmarried